Really now. These earnest men and woman believe that they are doing their part to "give back to America" after being allowed to serve in the Armed Services for God and Country. There will be no convincing them to go back to mother's basement and play xBox and maybe smoke a blunt. The only sane member of this little troupe is Semper Fido lying there with his Service Animal vest. He came for the biscuits and water dish. He, being the only one who noticed the photographer is the only hope that these Patriots would survive their mission should the enemy be engaged.
Ralphie was out late the night before and overslept necessitating his report for duty in his Old Glory Pajamas. With his APMV battery charge nearly depleted, he will have to stop in next door at the Fancy Nails by Mo'niq for an electrical outlet. "Hey, Ralphie, that gun stock makes a great place to rest your weary chin."
Brian with his homemade Kamo Kilt is the envy of all wannabe Celt-like Patriots and boast of "going commando" with all the females who crossed to the other side of the cars that were parked in front of this Marine Recruiting Station. Just in case the situation arises, he keeps a spare pair of tighty-whities in his spurran along with a single gold plated round for himself if he is ever captured. "No, I'm not actually Scottish, but I want to be. I would have been 1/3 Scottish if my great grandfather hadn't been deported for talking so much like a Brit. The closest thing I have to Celtic-stuff is Wendy's red hair."
Wendy, aka Flame, has hung out with the boys since she was 9 years old. Not exactly former-military, she loves to play air-guitar with her weapon. Her camo flak vest is covering up her "covert military assets" which can just be discerned peeking out with a blue starry field. She made her own outfit, too, by cutting the legs off of an old pair of Levis just above the length of the front pockets. "The boys never turn me away when I am in uniform. Sometimes I play M*A*S*H Nurse when we are not on deployment."
Marco (not pictured) headed over to the Shop 'n' Drop for a pack of Camels and four BigBurrp colas. Fortunately for Ralphie, the Recruiting Center is located at the previous location of Chin's Tiki Outi Restaurant and they have two wheelchair accessible restrooms in the back for when the BigBurrps make him more full of piss than crap. Semper Fido can just use the front wheel of the Camry parked nearby.
The Marine Lieutenant inside came out at 10:30 and asked the Dynamic Trio to take their "support services" over to the Shop 'n' Drop since they have been robbed several times in the last year and were far more of a target that was his Recruiting office. The silly buggers insisted that they had a right to sit on a public sidewalk with their weapons any time they wanted to. He explained that while he personally wanted to thank them for their good intentions, they were scaring away all the prospective recruits. Said he, "your presence here gives people the impression that military service is dangerous and that is something we are trying to dispel."
Intransigent in their insistence that they were indeed keeping the military safe from crazy armed people, they stayed until their bus arrived at noon.
His plea is to come unarmed unless you have proper permits. Bring your own lawn chair and plenty of water.
Similarly, if planning to wear chain link armor you might want to wear a catheter or pack a pair of wire cutters to remove one crucial strategic link, if you know what I mean.
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